The phenomenon of the third meeting
There is something magically true and threatening in that number three. When you go out with someone for the third time, it seems that you have already started investing in a relationship, and still nothing has happened and you can get out smoothly without losses.
The first meeting served to assess whether it is worth preparing for the second, at the second you determined that it was worth it and you can hardly wait for the third, because…
When you have already climbed three steps so gradually and slowly, you can run the next ten. The third step is something like an accelerator. You feel you need to decide something. You don't want to decide anything. Something should happen. Spontaneous. How can anything happen spontaneously, when the third meeting is decisive, in one way or another.
If you run into bed and have politely walked around two laps before you fall, it's okay. If it's okay in bed, too, then everything's fine. If it is more than fine, as you wish, as your heart tells you with a discreet arrhythmia, as you imagine waiting for the third meeting every time you close your eyes, then nothing is wrong.
Because then, you have to ask yourself if he feels the same way.
Is he shaken by the magic of number three at all, or will he just as easily freak you out when he achieves what he wanted as if you did it right away on the first date?
It is clear to you that you are standing on the edge of the abyss of love, and that your soles are itching to jump, but that at this moment, before the third meeting, you can simply turn your soles in the other direction, walk away from that edge to a safer place, invest nothing and lose nothing.
But what is the challenge then? And it wouldn't be fun not to find that out.
And what kind of fun is it when you have a slide in your stomach, the big one with curves, ups and downs? Ah, well it’s a party not to be missed. Everyone is afraid of that slide. And everyone catches at least one ride. And everyone screams in horror and delight. If you give up that ride, you don't know what you're missing, even if you drive for all the money.
Because you don't know if the other one feels the same way. You hope so. You expect. You encourage yourself. It's not very fun to fall in love alone and all by yourself. It is not very responsible to give him every chance on the third meeting and risk not inviting you anymore, because he does not feel like you.
And what should a woman do?
Well, to stop with the "what ifs". To try to talk to the man with whom she reached magic number three. Maybe he concluded that you were crazy, neurotic, and too paranormal for his notions. And maybe that's what attracts him. Maybe he will be interested in a woman who makes a question out of something that should go its own way. You may find out what the natural course of things is for him, and whether it is acceptable to you. You may find that he is as nervous as you are. You may agree to spend the third meeting commercially and to schedule something more intimate for the fourth. Maybe you both hate uncertainty and surprises, you are shy and nervous in anticipation of physical intimacy. You may be relieved. Talk. Because if you put things together between you - as common, which are talked about, discussed, and concluded together from the very beginning, you have already achieved something of the magic of number three.
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